The loss of the goat kids and our favorite doe, Claire, really begs the question,
"What do we really live for" at its most basic level. Oh, there are lots of answers, but
to be more specific, "Are we living for moments?" I actually have a quote on my kitchen wall, "We do not remember days, we remember Moments."
Oh, I agree, but should we base how we live, our choices, around glimpses, flicks in time? Certainly, moments can change everything forever. I have been there. However, when I think of the time spent trying to help Claire deliver her kids or helping Eve with hers, I consider the many days in the past year where we've had tremendous satisfaction from the farm, the animals, the land in general.
It calls to mind how the night I lost my brother and sister in a fire, or the day my dad died shortly after. . .How many amazing times, how many memories I have, and their loss only makes a person cling more so to those left; it should not make a person push what is left that can help you heal away, correct?
No reason to throw out what happiness there is in something great because something of importance is lost.
I'm often asked my family members how we can tie ourselves down with this place, the animals and all that is involved here. We cannot go on vacations or even overnight trips, by and large. We are undertaking a large financial burden, as well.
People sometimes suggest the children will be deprived of added "things" and "trips" due to this entanglement, so I have to wonder at these times, "What am I living for?"
Do we live for moments where we have five days out of 365 to splurge and visit Pigeon Forge, TN or the beach (not something I've ever liked, at any rate), or do we live for the whole year, day in and out, and sacrifice a week off for what seems to be the greater good?
I always tell family that it is not worth having a house full of "things" - inanimate things - to come home to day in, day out only to be able to take a trip now and again.
I can open the back door and feed horses carrots from the porch, hatch chicks in the kitchen in the incubator, ride the horses now and again, bring neglected animals back from the brink and see them placed, create our own "real" jelly, soap, butter and cheese and drink actual milk from animals we've raise and cared for, we can bottle feed little goat kids and get goat kisses when milking because they think we are the coolest :)
A trip to Tennessee, don't get me wrong, it is a good time, and it beats delivering goat kids that do not make it at 5am and a vet trip at 6am to put down your favorite goat; however, those are moments in the grand scheme of life, and I'm sorry, so far, the trip doesn't beat goat kid kisses.