Adopters who Flake

There are 5 Arabians I am trying to place into good homes.

Please visit petfinder to learn more about them and adoption requirements.

With that said, I usually can only take in desperate cases, and this case is not yet one I would have put into that category. These horses are okay right now, but once winter hits, they will be in serious need of a home with plenty of hay and shelter.

Now, that isn't to say they aren't in need now, they are, but they are still okay and can be placed from where they are.

That said, there was a person who inquired locally about one of the geldings. She said she had nearly 300 acres, gave farrier and vet references and showed photos of her horses and location - looked nice. The vet said he's seen her horses, albeit a year ago, and everything looked and sounded good.

She knew that references were required, understood the need for a forever home was #1 priority, understood the horses need training (must have), knew the horse coming with the gelding was a young horse, etc. The adopter, who already didn't have fund to feed the horses she has paid to transport the gelding and a 6 month old colt down here to meet her
here at my location. She was very late because her truck broke down on the way, and the potential adopter left and came back later once the horses made it here to see them.

I wasn't home and told the adopter she could come see the horses. She brought a whole gang of people here, and some of the people started chasing the horses, who are already spooky, and the adopter couldn't get the rednecks to leave the horses alone. Well, she shouldn't have brought them, without permission, to my house, but she calls me and asks when I will be home because she is afraid they are going to scare the horses badly and try to load them after 8 hours on the trailer and take them another hour into Ohio instead of letting them rest. She also said she'd told one of the people she could have the colt. Ummm, I don't think so! She said she wanted me to stop them from bothering the horses. I rushed home to do so, but the people were already gone.

I talked the girl who thought she'd just take the colt, and I explained references and approval was needed. She gave me a vet reference and it didn't pan out. I looked up photos of her location and horses on myspace, and they were terrible. Loose barbed wire and pitiful looking horses. Maybe I am wrong, so look at these photos - you tell me, am I wrong? Isn't the fence pitiful, the hooves rather overgrown on the one horse, the t-posts dangerous? Wouldn't a foal kill himself in that barbed wire at 6 months old? Would the horses run him over without a his mama there to protect him? There are at least 8 horses on the property. I've cropped them to just show what is relevant. There is more to horsecare than food. Goodness!

You tell me anyone with a thought to a horses care would bring a foal into that environment?!

The adopter said she was moving her horses because this woman never let her ride her own horses, took them over and acted like they were her own, banded her pony's tail for a parade and forgot the band and the pony's TAIL FELL OFF! And she told me she didn't feel good about talking the horses there. I told her had I known that was the place they were going, I'd not have approved the situation, but she seemed like a good intentioned person, so I asked her what she wanted to do? I asked if she wanted the horses to stay with me while she picked up her horses and moved them to a better location. She said she'd hoped to move her horses and didn't want them at this property anymore. She let me know she had 6, 2 of which this person wouldn't release. She agreed and thanked me over and over for offering to let the colt and gelding stay here while she moved her horses (I wouldn't have released them to the situation there at the pictured farm, anyway, but I didn't say that at this point). She said she was afraid to even go over and move her horses, but I told her I'd send my husband along if she needed help. I told my husband, another rescue and a few more folks that I felt sure she'd never end up actually taking the horses. I also made it known I wouldn't let them go if the situation didn't look like they would be well cared for.

#1. WHY was this woman trying to adopt MORE horses?!

She said she come back on Friday (this was a Tuesday) with money for the horses care, their hay and feed, and I said that was fine. She said we'd move the horses to the new farm, which I drove out by and checked out eventually (It looked nice). Saturday she came and took her horse trailer while I was gone that she'd left to haul the horses in here at my farm. I repeated to everyone I knew this adopter would never take the horses she'd had brought here. She called Sunday and told me she was now afraid . . .

Suddenly, of course. . .

to bring the colt to the new farm since she had a very aggressive gelding who would hurt him.

#3 Why didn't she consider this before she wasted so many people's time and gas and such?

I told her that was fine. I'd keep the colt. She said she loved the gelding and would still take him. She said her daughter was going to train him, work with him all the time, had agreed to, and she was 100% certain she'd come to get him today.

I still was sure she'd flake.

Come this morning, I checked me email and suddenly and not so shockingly, her daughter, she says, decided she couldn't train the gelding. She didn't have time, so she wasn't sure she should take him.

I asked her if she could foster him without a timeline until I found an adopter. She replied that is would cost her $125 a month to do so at the new farm and might be able to for a one or two.

#4. If you couldn't afford to keep him, why bring him down and waste other people's money in the process? You know, the owner could have used that money to feed the horses if you hadn't been so silly and selfish.

#5. You should have had funds to put him in training whether your daughter - if she is that flakey - fell through concerning training, and regardless, these horses were something you obligated yourself to care for. . . properly!

So I told her that was fine. I told her I would keep him and do the right thing by them. I told her that I had no way to know when he might get placed and couldn't take him over and just risk her calling me a week from now with a new story about why she couldn't board him.

This must have hit a nerve because she sent a snippy - Yes, a snippy email to ME! - and she said she "said" she'd take him however long it took! Now, that isn't really what she said, but anyway. . .my next email really hit another, larger nerve.

I was told she didn't have to defend herself or answer for her actions. She was entitled, she said, to change her mind. She didn't know so many stipulations would be placed on taking the horses:

Oh really? Didn't you read the petfinder ad you responded to that says:

"for adoption with no fee with an adoption contract, a facility check, with vet and farrier references only. I will personally check all references."

Anyway, she tells me she has had horses longer than me, she understands they aren't to be treated as Idols or Gods (ummm, does this mean they don't deserve decent care and you shouldn't feel compelled to honor your obligation?) and on and on. She tells me she never lies. You read the above and make a decision on that. She said she said she'd take the gelding for as long as it took - I have the email that says otherwise. . .she said she didn't want the colt to begin with - I have the email that says otherwise. . . she said I had no business assuming because the other place she boarded wasn't suitable just based on photos - you look at the photos and see if I can't justifiably decide that. . . she said that I was judging the other woman I wouldn't let the colt go to based on the fact she seemed of a lower class than` I am . . . well, she did seem like someone without the means to care for one horses, without understanding on the matter of horsecare and lied about using a vet. . .I think that is enough to make that assumptions I made. She did say she'd bring hay to help feed him, but would you hold her breath? I am not.

I sent a message back that said if she felt she had done the right thing, I hoped she was happy with herself over it. . . and blocked her from my email - I am done dealing with it.

The woman probably had good intentions in someway to begin with, but clearly, she wasn't suitable.

What is the moral of this story?

This should serve to show you what lengths you MUST go to screen adopters.

I share this to teach us all a lesson:

PERSONALLY visit the farm or facility in question

Find out who owns it. Check their references, too

Ask for more details from the vet when you check references

Have a rock solid contract upfront

Charge a small fee to avoid people just looking for something free

Make an adopter PAY TRANSPORT~!

Take a bit of time to get to know the adopter if they are local.

Lots of folks seem nice and like a good home to begin with.

I will keep these horses until they find true forever homes which will give them a proper facility and good, stable care!